"The Lord works in mysterious ways..."

Such a typical thing to say. It is such a common, overused phrase in my culture. Many times people say it and are completely sincere-they truly believe it. Other times, people say it to appease themselves or someone else-to provide comfort during a trial or struggle. But there a million reasons I could share with you to say that it is a phrase that is TRUE. The Lord of the universe, the King of all kings, does things that will just blow your mind. Sure does mine. He does things that will confound the wise but make the simplest person feel loved and valued and cherished. He does things that will knock your socks off. He will do things that make you feel completely overwhelmed with how huge He is, how mighty and majestic He is but at the very same time feel so completely humbled that He would care for a simple girl like you, or even realize that He could care so deeply about a simple, small part of a simple, small life. Wow. He truly works in mysterious, amazing, beautiful, unfathomable ways. I can't understand it most times. All I know is that I can lay my head down on my pillow and remember His promises.

• He will never EVER leave me or forsake me.
• His loves ENDURES forever.
• He truly is UNCHANGING.
• He is TRANSFORMING me into His perfect likeness even though I am still so far off.
• He is FAITHFUL and JUST.
• He made me for HIMSELF.
• He KNOWS it all.
• He LOVES me anyway.

I know this blog probably doesn't make a whole lot of sense because I am speaking in general, but I hope it reaches into your evening, into your heart and mind, and touches the deepest part of your soul-to remind you or maybe to tell you for the first time ever, that you are on His mind, on His heart and that He will "tax the remotest star and the last grain of sand" to show you how much He LOVES you and KNOWS you and WANTS you for Himself. Yes, in mysterious, magical, glorious ways.

Yes, it's true.

God has called me!

God has called me to this very thing and I need His strength to live it! It is His heart's desire for His people!

All Turned to Holiness
"In that day shall there be upon the bells of the horses, Holiness Unto The LORD" (Zechariah 14:20).

Happy day when all things shall be consecrated, and the horses' bells shall ring out holiness to the LORD! That day has come to me. Do I not make all things holy to God? These garments, when I put them on or take them off, shall they not remind me of the righteousness of Christ Jesus my LORD? Shall not my work be done as unto the LORD? Oh, that today my clothes may be vestments, my meals sacraments, my house a temple, my table an altar, my speech incense, and myself a priest! LORD, fulfill Thy promise, and let nothing be to me common or unclean.

Let me in faith expect this. Believing it to be so, I shall be helped to make it so. As I myself am the property of Jesus, my LORD may take an inventory of all I have, for it is altogether His own; and I resolve to prove it to be so by the use to which I put it this day. From morning till evening I would order all things by a happy and holy rule. My bells shall ring -- why should they not? Even my horses shall have bells -- who has such a right to music as the saints have? But alt my bells, my music, my mirth, shall be turned to holiness and shall ring out the name of "the happy God."

-"Faith's Checkbook" Spurgeon

Regret

The Lord is showing me how I live each day in regret. I hate this! This is not the victorious, glorious, amazing life He has purchased for me...I know this. I had not realized how regretful I've been living until the past few days.

Let me back up..

Here is where I will be honest, as ashamed as I may be tempted to feel. I struggle. I fight to be obedient and disciplined with my time. There are multiple aspects to this struggle but one is that I can easily fall into laziness and apathy. Ugh. Days will pass and although I often feel busy, at the end of the day, I don't know what I accomplished. I don't know how to break out of this cycle. When I lay down to go to sleep at night and look at what I got done, I often feel that I did not get anything done! Part of it, as I mentioned, is laziness...but another part is that I feel like I get up in the morning and suddenly it is midnight or one a.m. and the day is gone. I have no idea how to use my time effectively. I have ALWAYS struggled with this. But in this constant struggle...I have began to see how I am now living in REGRET.

That end of the day reflection comes and I just feel horrible about myself and how I don't know how to live effectively. This is so normal that I have been blind to the fact that I am not giving my time to Him, I've just accepted this fast-paced-but-accomplishing-little lifestyle as normal. But in my heart and mind, I know that this is not right. This is not the way He would have a child of His live.

I could go on and on about my struggle with time...but to just face it is this: I've been living by the whims of my flesh. Which is not okay. On days when I have been busy with school or teaching, I rush through my day with little to no peace in His love...I don't even speak to Him. I know that if I did, He would fill me up (Phil 4:4-8) but I have just been existing..not living. However, the worst part is this: I do the same thing when I have a day of freedom in my time. If I have extra time, I STILL struggle to accomplish the things that I need or want to do! It is a little bit better but I get so distracted with things that do not matter.

So, ultimately, I know how to combat these issues...before the throne of grace. I have tons of practical tools to help me through this..but I need Christ. All parts of the human life need Christ..even time management and choosing how to organize tasks. Some would probably read this and think I am being crazy to feel so strongly and think so hard about something like this.. But to me, it is huge. It is a struggle that I have had for years and years. I desire for EVERY part of my life to reflect His holiness and purity...including time, tasks, free-time, and busyness. I need JESUS.

As I said before, there are more aspects and factors to this battle, but all of them need to be placed into His wonderful hands. So to begin today, I am going clean. Simple, right? But I desperately need His out-of-this-world strength to even get through this!

Shame wants to creep up to admit that I struggle with something that seems so mundane, but I will boast in my weaknesses so that His power will be glorified! Yes, this shows how VERY weak I am, but HE is my joy and my strength! His grace is enough..

If anyone has any advice, I am completely open!